Saturday, March 5, 2011

Dear Matthew

One year ago today, you were diagnosed with diabetes. It’s been a hard year. Full of lancets, blood, sugar checks, shots, ketones, carb counting, pod changes, highs and those lows that you hate so much. The list goes on and on.

But despite the challenges that this year has brought, your dad and I are choosing to CELEBRATE this day! Not only because you are alive and healthy, but because this past year you have grown in ways we never could have dreamed of. YOU turned this into a year of bravery, courage, and fearlessness.

God is teaching you to be BRAVE. I first noticed it at History Night last spring. Mrs. MacKenzie asked for a volunteer who wanted to go up to the microphone and invite parents to her classroom after the program. Your dad and I were shocked to discover that you volunteered. The boy I knew wouldn't have considered it. But you gathered up your courage, marched right up and spoke in front of about 200 strangers! My heart burst with pride as I watched you put your nervousness aside and take a risk. Wow!

God is teaching you to be COURAGEOUS.  Remember diabetes camp? I know it was scary at first. Other than Tanner, you didn’t know a single person. And you were so new to diabetes. But did that stop you? No way! You chose to be courageous and go for it! Not only did you have fun, you also walked away with the Most Responsible Award. Now you want to be a Counselor-In-Training one day….just like Derek. With your smile, sense of humor, and outgoing spirit, I know you will be a blessing and encouragement to all the kids.

God is teaching you to be FEARLESS.  Remember when you decided to give yourself that first shot? Something you continued to do every day for months. You are becoming a boy willing to do whatever it takes to take care of himself. I AM SO PROUD OF THIS CHOICE!! Your dad and I love that we can trust you to do what we ask. It takes a lot of courage to do the right thing.

God is turning you into a BRAVE young man. There was a time when you were a very picky eater!  But you’ve been trying new foods. Everything from brown rice and carrots….to lima beans and your new favorite: hamburgers! You’re trying lots of new things and enjoying most of them.

What is bringing about this transformation in you? Is part of it being a child with diabetes? Every day you face challenges I will never understand because I can only watch from the sidelines. But I love that you are choosing to meet the battle head-on every single day. 

Yes, you have shown a tremendous amount of courage this past year, but do you know what amazes me the most?  Through all the difficult days, you have never lost, what your dad and I like to call, "the spirit of Matthew." You always have a smile on your face. You're always quick to make someone laugh. You are always up for an adventure! Roadtrip! You don't let diabetes slow you down one bit. I admire you for that.

Matthew, GOD LOVES YOU so much. I believe He is making you STRONG for a reason. He has big plans for you!  Exciting plans that are going to knock your socks off!  “And we know that in ALL THINGS God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28.

I am so thankful that God chose me to be your mom.

I love you,


Heidi =) said...

Tracy, that was an amazing, beautiful letter! Happy dia-versary Matthew! (and Tracy) I feel blessed to have been able to peak in to your world over the last year.

LaLa said...

Oh my - what a beautiful post for this special day in which Matthew's life was forever changed. I'm so blessed to have been able to follow your journey over the past year - - - your positive attitude is a true inspiration.

And . . . why haven't we met yet???
Can we work on that???

Our Diabetic Warrior said...

It's so amazing to be aware of the blessings that God gives us inbetween the struggles.

God is molding our children each and every day. He might not have prevented our children from getting diabetes, but He's there with us every step of he way taking care of them.

God bless you and your family on this day!!!

Joanne said...

What a beautiful tribute to Matthew! Sorry we couldn't make Thursday happen, but let's get together soon!

Valerie said...

I love this post! I have to admit that about halfway through, I decided to pretend it was written to me so that I could remember I am all those thins too! (I have been having some crummy days lately.) I especially like that part about Matthew not losing his spirit--that may be the most important one of them all! Thanks for sharing all the silver linings. :)

Denise said...

beautiful letter

Unknown said...

Love to you and Matthew on this day Tracy. Your heartfelt letter is beautiful. I am sure he will cherish it throughout out his life.

Lora said...

Love it!! Thanks for sharing.

Hallie Addington said...

I'm crying! This is a beautfiul, beautiful letter! I love it! Here's to the first year - with BIG THANKS to God for getting all of you through it and helping you see the GOOD in this life.

Heidi / D-Tales said...

What a lovely letter!

traveller said...

Must be the stress of the past few days...but I'm crying here. Tell Matthew maybe he can still meet K one of these days.
..."and we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to His purpose..."

God has a purpose...For Matthew, for K...
Love ya.