Saturday, April 2, 2011

A Huge Discovery

Since March of last year, I've been caught in the headlights of diabetes.  It hasn't been pretty.

Diabetes has challenged every single area of my life.  EVERYTHING has been impacted by diabetes.  Life has changed forever. 

And quite frankly, I haven't handled it very well.  I mean, I'm doing my best and life is getting better.  God is carrying me through....of that, I am confident.

The biggest challenge for me is high blood sugar.  I hate it.  I feel like such a failure when the highs linger. 

My brain travels on fast-forward to the future complications that Matthew might face.....all because I cannot get his sugar in range today.

I don't want him to pay for my mistakes.

But I've made a huge discovery!  (Thanks in part to my more faithful quiet time with God....and also a recent post by Meri.)

I have learned that the bad times don't last. 

Matthew may be high for days or even weeks.  I will rack my brain trying to figure out if it's because of a growth spurt?  Coming out of honeymoon?  Basal?  Bolus?  Mistakes on carb counting?  The list of possibilitites is endless.

BUT...I will figure it out.  Eventually I WILL get his sugar back in range.  I WILL!

Bad days do not last forever.

Just until the next growth spurt....or carb counting mistakes.....or high fat meal....or activity mis-calculations......or......


Heidi =) said...

Love you! <3

Jules said...

Hi Tracy, I know what you mean, its an all consuming activity figuring out the WHY's. I figure its a learning curve and something we cant know everything about managing immediately. Im going day by day, also learning from others and keen to hear what God has to say to help us out! xx.

Unknown said...

What goes up...must come down - xoxo

NikDuck said...

It is such a frustrating disease to deal with isn't it, especially when you work so hard trying to keep him in range. I get it! I'm trying to have the attitude of just treating the high or low and moving on, but it is so hard to not linger and wrack my brain over what I did wrong.

Anonymous said...

With a pump, it can be easier. The second high of the day (if she is not very active that day), I will raise the temp basal for three hours and check two hours after to see how/if it is taking effect. Unfortunately, there are times a huge increase is needed, and if she is away from home and not wearing Dexcom, I don't always have the nerve to be very aggressive with temp basals. At home I am very agressive. But, yes, what comes up can and will come down. I believe it is only the long periods of highs which cause problems, though no one really knows positively. It did take a while to become sufficiently aggressive when treating stubborn highs; I was fearful. P.S. By "aggressive" I mean a 100 percent increase, plus raising basals if need be. I have given her more than twice her basal rates during puberty. Thankfully, for us, this has always occurred at home in the evening and overnight hours; she has never ever needed large temp basal increases during the day.

Leigh said...

Right on, Tracy. I am so thankful we have the wise D-moms that have come before us because it is so hard to see that it really will get better. But it will! hugs!!

Anonymous said...

Hey (:
I'm not that great with commenting on these types of things. Cuz I don't have diabetes. I do have a friend who does though. Thanks for sharing your everyday life. It defiantly gives me a greater respect for those who have diabetes. Cures happen every day. One day diabetes will find its way. As will heart disease... (: Keep the hope, and faith.(: You guys are in my prayers <3